BEing Blog 10 – Conversations
I have had a week of profoundly interesting and thought-provoking conversations both with myself and with other people. These conversations have been deep, authentic, powerful, and passionate, leaving me fizzing with gratitude and an enriched belief in the good there is in the world.
Each conversation strengthened the relationship, there was connection and a flow of ideas between the two of us. Nothing was forced or difficult, yet we weren’t skirting around the edges or skimming the surface, staying within the comfortable. These conversations went deep, well beyond the superficial, “How was your day?” or “Do you have plans for the weekend?”, and “How are the kids?”. Difficult subjects were raised and treated with respect, with no boundaries. It felt safe, it felt real, and it felt fulfilling.
Think over the conversations you have had this week: the real ones, the ones that stand out, the ones that were meaningful and memorable. Ponder the relationship that was enhanced by the conversation, the person involved, how it started, how it flowed, and how you felt after it finished. What about these memorable conversations makes them memorable?
What would it be like if these conversations where the kind we have most of the time? How would your life be changed if every interaction was truly meaningful, with both parties truly present?
Susan Scott, author of Fierce Conversations says, “The conversation IS the relationship”. Without conversation there is NO relationship. If we stop and think about this for a moment, I’m sure we can all see how true this is – a relationship is defined by the quality of the relationship. For example, a superficial conversation means a superficial relationship, a meaningful conversation means a meaningful relationship, and so forth.
When relationships break down, whether it be lovers, friends, family, or colleagues inevitably the breakdown is in the communication; the conversation.
If we all paid more attention, spoke less, listened more, asked quality questions to seek understanding, and were truly interested in our conversational partner I believe we would go a long way towards healing relationships, and society.
“One conversation won’t change the world, but one conversation can” Susan Scott
I guess that is really what the BEing project is about, having deep conversations with our community that hopefully lead to other deep conversations both with oneself and the world. I am so inspired by the conversations I have had this week and am so grateful for the courageous people who share their stories, their challenges, and their lives with me.
I am truly blessed.